


Not Yet, Not Ever

by DuskyMafiosa



Series: No-Redemption AU [1]
Category: Steven Universe (Cartoon)
Genre: Dubious Consent, Dubious Morality, F/F, Lapis is a stone-cold betty, No-Redemption AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-08
Updated: 2015-06-08
Packaged: 2018-04-03 10:23:53
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,181
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4097398
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DuskyMafiosa/pseuds/DuskyMafiosa
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Being subjected to Lapis’ whims was never something Jasper wanted to accept, but these polarizing wants hollowed the warrior faster than erosion, yet just as sure.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Not Yet, Not Ever

**Author's Note:**

> Thank you to AshleyXIV, loribsantos, and MySuperior for being the betas for this work.

Time is nothing to Jasper, but she was starting to think this has been going on far too long. Struggling against the ocean floor where the darkness is too thick for sun’s light to penetrate, it was only a guess how long she'd been kept down here, anyway. At first, it seemed possible to wear her captor down by stubbornness alone; however, the number of failures climbed higher with each thrash and sag against the chains, forcing the crisscrossed links to further impress against the warrior’s torso and wrists. _It’s only water. Why is this so hard?_ This always ended with a wail of frustration that would surely crumble buildings if ever released above sea level. Anger temporarily spent, she realized that she couldn't make her escape. Not yet.

While freedom was never far from her thoughts, Lapis always found ways to complicate the matter. For instance, lingering telepathy was a side-effect of randomly fusing for varying amounts of time, the minds becoming increasingly unwilling to separate once more. Even while plotting, Jasper could still hear that infuriating voice carry through her thoughts and break apart each idea in waves. It was an upsetting occurrence, never failing to crop up especially when she was led to the brink of climax. The firm presence of fingers, teeth, and tongue would all work in tandem, then suddenly pull away, only to leave the taunting whisper of _“Not ever”_   in their stead. From then on, the teasing was inseparable from the pleasure.

Being subjected to Lapis’ whims was never something Jasper wanted to accept, but these polarizing wants hollowed the warrior faster than erosion, yet just as sure.

Months (or so Jasper surmised) of this treatment passed, some faster than others, but none without their share of enforced introspection. Jasper listened to Lapis recount the destruction the warrior gem had been created to inflict and spread. Other than constantly hearing about her greatest achievements, albeit interspersed with outdated curse words, there seemed to be no point to this.

 _“The point is_ sympathy _,”_   Lapis interjected. _“You did all these things and now you have to face them.”_

Lapis was only present in voice, but Jasper’s eyes fixed on a spot in the dark water while replying, anyway. _“I have. I got my orders, saw them through, then went back to Yellow Diamond for more instructions. There’s nothing else to it.”_

 _“Yes there is!”_   The water quaked on all sides for miles, undoubtedly causing problems for the fishermen above them. _“You have no regard for the suffering you've caused. That ends here.”_

_“What use would I have for a human emotion that sounds like such a burden?”_

There was a pause, a silent consideration. _“If you ever want to see Peridot again, you'll learn to regret what you've done.”_

 _"This little stunt has made you arrogant. I would crush your gem_ right now _if I wasn't chained,”_   Jasper seethed, rage relegating the drowning feeling that came with inhaling water to an annoying ache in the back of her mind.

The voice returned, steeped in amusement instead of its usual razing monotone. _“Oh, I've hit a nerve! It’s been a while since I found the last one. What do you miss most about her?”_

Millions of memories came to the fore of Jasper’s mind, everything from being scolded for trying (incorrectly) to fly their ship to sharing the view of passing planets. Between countless wars, tenderness was reserved for those moments alone, and now they were no longer between only the two of them. Her captor had no right to such information, but there was no way to take any of it back.

Yellow eyes narrowed in the darkness. _“I can’t hide anything from you.”_

 _“You thought you could?”_   Lapis made a disbelieving sound, its meaning conveyed even though it was garbled through the water.

Jasper knew the joy this brought Lapis, and in turn yearned for a way to deny her the satisfaction of having such an absurd amount of power. However, not one to let her last sliver of hope be dashed against the rocks surrounding her feet, she resorted to the last valuable tactic she’d learned from the Homeworld Army’s interrogation techniques: threatening harm against something a gem finds valuable.

In response, the chains tightened, deepening the splinters already set in her bones. Jasper shouted both in fresh pains without any possible salves and at her ears’ discomfort at the gargled scream. _“I'm warning you,”_   Lapis declared. _“Never try to bring Steven into this.”_ _Lesson learned._ _“You think I haven’t already considered that? Of course he'd be horrified at this, at_ me _, but you don't really care about that, do you? The only one you'd spare a second thought towards has crashed onto this planet, possibly searching for you now, ignorant of all I've put you through.”_   Solid hands framed the sides of Jasper’s face, their softness a false kindness belied only by the reserves of strength within. _“Would you tell her?”_

Before the words could settle in Jasper’s mind, she heard _“Would she still love you?”_

The questions left a bitter taste in the warrior’s mouth. Greater than the water pressure and trammels, the shame of it all pushed down on her, surrounded her, gave her no mental space to recede into. Disgusted by the hands now gripping her hair, Jasper couldn't find any form of evasion; apart from the intangible words, there was nothing to focus on, tear apart, or grind to dust. Not even her own body, shackled as it was. Part of her had hoped she would perish down here, never having to see the hurt of betrayal on Peri’s face. With a captor this cruel, life was whittled down to only pain and pleasure, both of which were completely out of Jasper’s bound hands. The increasing harshness that Lapis wrenched Jasper’s hair with mirrored the ocean gem’s growing impatience. After tumbling through her thoughts long enough, Jasper settled on a proper response: _“Will you let me find out?”_

The chains slackened, the ocean gem released her grip, and the warrior let out a distorted groan.

 _“Perhaps,”_   Lapis responded slowly, _“but not anytime soon. You regret what I've done to you, what we've done together. That’s a_ start _.”_

No matter how quickly Jasper tried to suppress the flash of hope, her captor always sensed it, this time causing a shift in tone.

 _“However,”_   she continued sternly, _“you still have a long way to go, and I'm not anywhere near done with you.”_

Sagging against the bonds, Jasper was left alone. Like always, she felt for any sort of give that wasn't there before, this time contemplating the new information while she did so. She still couldn't make an escape, but, assuming that Lapis was honest, there was a new path ahead of her. Whether or not there was some sort of ambush waiting at the end of it can’t be determined yet, so she resolves to feel it out. If there is, she'll just bide her time until a critical error is made, telling herself _Not yet_ in the meantime.

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first work of this type, so feedback is appreciated. Thank you for reading.


End file.
